Strength.

I hate the feeling of unrest.  I get to a point where I know I'm leaving...but the unrest inside of me hurts so much that I just want it to go away so I "make up".  I'm just one of those wives who thinks it's easier to look the other way, or that chooses to believe the lies (although we don't ever really believe), so that I don't have to hurt.  I don't want to cry.  I don't want to see him cry.  I don't want to break JDRW's heart.

And, I mean really, the lies are just the cherry on top right?  If I'm being honest.  I'm not happy here.  I want to be happy.  I try to be happy.  But, there's nothing here worth being happy for. 
It just so...drastic.  To move my children and I half way across the country...to start over, again.
 
So, here's hoping for strength.